Do you feel run ragged by Monday evening each week? Are you fed up of the criticism from parents? Have you realised that empathy matters but is not a trait granted to all?
If you’ve answered yes to all of the above, I know this means that you have been working flat out since schools have returned in January.
Teaching remotely is not a walk in the park.
Teaching remotely whilst having your own children to attend to is no holiday.
Teaching right now is a challenge!
Right now educators up and down the country are feeling an immense pressure to do their best for a range of people. Let me list them: the pupils, their school, the parents, their family, and if they have any time left themselves. We are tired! I think I can vouch for many educators when I say that we are not trying to upset parents intentionally but we really can’t please all. Empathy matters and is key.
Who are the priority?
As educators, our single most important priority are the pupils. It has been, and always will be. Most teachers enter the profession because they want to make a difference: an impact, and to leave each day with a feeling of fulfilment.
With my hand on my heart, I can honestly tell you that at the moment, not many educators feel fulfilled. We (the royal we) are still however doing our best for the pupils in school. We are catering for the children of critical workers, the vulnerable pupils and those children working at home remotely to the best of our ability. I doubt there is a headteacher, who has thought, “I think we can just let the gap get wider for our pupils. Let’s just plan a scaled back curriculum because it is easier. Our pupil’s mental health will be fine. I think whilst they’re not able to socialise or see their friends that they will remain focussed and attentive all day when doing their remote learning. They’ll be ok…I mean children they’re resilient aren’t they?!”
No headteacher wants the pupils at home. No teacher wants to keep teaching remotely for the foreseeable future. And what does the phrase ‘foreseeable future’ even mean right now?!
Confusion v clarity?
It is an understatement to say that the recent weeks have been concisely confusing. The lack of clarity has been criminal. Change is challenging to manage in schools at the best of times but coupled with confusion, it certainly is not the best concoction for success.
All educators can safely unite in the collective consciousness of confusion. We are not confused because we do not know what to do for our pupils, but confused by the manner in which the government are communicating. As I have written before, Leadership requires the skill of perspective, yet this is not being modelled by our government in a time of great need. Where is their empathy?
At the very last minute, headteachers clamber to gain clarity, make decisions, and communicate this to our community: our pupils and their parents.
Consequently, we become the messengers who are being shot!
Empathy really matters
This is where empathy matters.
Parents, I hope, are not doing this intentionally yet their comments and criticisms over our decisions are beginning to have an impact on teachers and headteachers. Take a look at this letter written by an experienced headteacher I know. He is voicing his opinions and frustrations at the criticisms that his teachers have received from some parents at his school. His letter expresses emotion and demonstrates empathetic leadership at its best. He has the ability to understand the feelings of his teachers. He is fully aware of the many perspectives but as an empathetic leader he used his voice and made a sacrifice for his staff. This is commendable! Yet it shouldn’t have to be like this. With empathy from all, educators should be able to serve without fear of being shot on the frontline.
Let’s be honest – criticism only comes from a place of fear.
What we need is understanding
The pandemic has evoked feelings of fear. For some, it lays dormant and is only unleashed when triggered. For others it’s worn as a weapon ready to be used in action. When we understand this and know that it is the fear that is speaking we can take a step back and gain a different perspective. When we understand that parents, our colleagues and some pupils may be communicating from a place of fear, we are better equipped to handle the situation.
Educators may not always make the best decisions but aim to lead from a place of understanding.
All schools operate differently to the clients that they are serving. Our pupils are our clients and we know them well. We have taught, cared, fed and nurtured them. Some for many years since nursery. As educators we understand that parents want the best for their children. So do we. We have the same goal. For children to learn and thrive to the best version of themselves.
Having the ability to understand that everyone is living through the same pandemic is crucial. Knowing this means that there should be an understanding that everyone may be experiencing this in a number of ways. Once again perspective is key.
When we view the world through just one lens this can only lead to blindness. We become accustomed to one way. One perspective and it becomes the only way. There is no room for empathy. There is little understanding and there is certainly no growth.
There is strength in perspective.
What more can we do?
Empathy matters. It must be the choice for us all. We are all suffering or beginning to show signs of fatigue and it’s only the beginning of what may be another gruelling year. I am a realist at heart and know that nothing is permanent. This pandemic will end. Children will always need to learn and educators will always want to do the best for the pupils.
However, my concern is for teachers. If there isn’t an understanding of the varying perspectives in education from the government, I fear that many teachers may leave the profession. A greater sense of empathetic leadership in needed in schools and for educators right now.
Resilience is great, yes, but understandably, we all have different pressure points. I hope that we can continue to support each other and show non-judgemental understanding.
As the educational world morphs around us, we must continue to adapt. But most importantly, we must teach and lead without fear. We know we can teach well, we are simply evolving.
Reflection:
Why do we sometimes wait until our feelings are built up inside before talking?
Why is it that harsh messages are listened to more than the quiet voices?
Why does it take a volcano to erupt for people to believe that it is active?
Share your thoughts in the comments below.
Related: Why is empathy important to leaders?
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